Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Now, how does that grab you

When you can't write like pogge (come on, a one word title, twenty one word article and more hits than I get in a week) or actually have an informed opinion and some background knowledge about what you are going to write about (like these guys here, here, here, here or here), you end up picking a topic from the 1,500 RSS feeds you receive each day. Then to hopefully grab the readers attention long enough that they might actually read your article you need to come up with a great headline.

But it appears all writers must have the same problem. Here's one from the business feeds that caught me tonight:


Besides the fact that Home Depot's profits actually dropped by 66% for the quarter, that is a very funny title. I think I want to become a staff writer for the Globe business section. I could write articles about mundane topics and then through humorous titles send subliminal messages to corporate Canada. Yep, I want to do that.

Here's some titles I'm working on for the tech stocks
  • Apple shares blossom after release of new gadget
  • Microsoft patches up it's new market strategy
The oil and auto industry are easy
  • Exxon leaks that profits will spill over the top
  • General Motors runs out of gas
Retail Chains are important, they service industry is a big segment now a days.
  • Canadian Tire keeps on rolling
  • Chapters worms it's way around US parity issue
  • Hudsons Bay Co. set adrift with loss of leader
  • IKEA assembles two new locations
  • Sears exposes itself with public offering (you have to think about this one)
  • Sleep Country dozing through final quarter
  • Wal-Mart eyes new suppliers with a different slant
Doing Fast Food is relatively quick
  • Harvey's management gets grilled repeatedly at meeting
  • KFC licks it's production problems for good
  • McDonald's profit drives thru another quarter
  • Starbucks CEO has been roasted again
  • Tim Hortons PR strategy blown to bits
It could also work for Politicians
  • Harper harpooned by mistake (sorry that is just a snark)
Hey if you've got any good suggestions let me know. Believe me, I could really use the help.

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